So, I've made my decision

I am letting go of the Wolfman Mac experience. I can't continue to give as much time to that as they require. I really have no job to speak of...all things being equal, and the RenFest internship is more of a detriment than anything else. I need an income that will actually help to pay the bills and help to finish the house in the event I have to sell it.

Mark has been remarkably charitable in driving me down to the production, but they want Tuesdays and Thursdays, and suddenly they were asking for Sundays for make-up shoots and writer's meetings, and evenings to go to appearances...who really has that time and money!? Seriously, if I were less worried about the car breaking down and the cost of gas and the freaking mileage needed to get to WARREN and all points SOUTH, maybe I wouldn't have had to choose this option.

But in all seriousness - and this has all been serious - I have been making myself sick over the inevitable choice.

I missed half a day's pay (at a shitty $8 per hour before taxes) because the shoot didn't get done until nearly three a.m AGAIN. By the time we dropped off another production person south of the studio and headed back home, it was 3:40 am by the time I made it home! Other people live much closer to this production person's location, and Mark was schlepping her home!!?!???

Really?

Too much in-fighting and squabbling. Back-stabbing and effort wasted. When I would contribute a character or script idea, I was told there was already something like it. But then, something would go (inevitably awry) and I would be asked at the last minute to actually do the character, it was so very last minute, so nothing was prepared - costume-wise, prop needs, etc.

When I was asked to do something, it was usually requested when I was at work! I am watched, you know! Hellooooooooooooo. I have hours I have to adhere to, and when I am at work, I am supposed to be working! What do you do at work?

And when the she-demon would want something done, it always has a 4 hour turn-around time frame (or less). I need to get to sleep. I need to have time....and I do not have the equipment some of them do to work with. To write a commercial is not hard, but I need all of the information you can provide and that the customer wants given. To ask me to write something and get it back to you while I am getting paid to work at my job - during the work day - is wrong! And calling me to hound me and ask after the status DOES NOT HELP! You waited until the last minute, you have to give me time!!!! Damn it!

I wanted to fix the audio screwed up in production on a commercial, but of course, it wasn't something that could be fixed. Even though it wasn't a me thing, I still felt as though I had let Mac down.

I find very few of the people involved have had training with their equipment...they just have the money to be able to purchase the cameras and the sound gear, etc. But do they know how to use it? NO, they do not (for the most part)! Do they accept constructive comments or questions...NO, they DO NOT! Why wouldn't we use the good mic as a boom and mic Mac for the spots that way? Geez there is a lot a wasted time and energy there.

Does the show look as though it were shot by monkeys in the dark? Yes, a lot of the time, it does. White balance!! Doggone it.

Are there ego's in the way of turning out potentially great stuff? Oh yeah, baby!

Are they taking too much time getting dumb extra shots that won't be edited in....oh you better believe it! Hey! I know that on FILMS a lot of material is shot and never used. Or, shot, edited in, and then for time, taken out. BUT YOU ARE NOT A FILM or a big $ production! We are volunteering our time and sometimes money to make this run. Did Mark ever get repaid for the $40 bucks or better in McDonald's he contributed to one late night session? NO!

This stuff happened all of the time, and she knows who she is who needs to get her crap together.

Hey, Martin Scare-sezzi (no Mac, not you), it's a cheesey, late night, b-flick production. Three cameras shooting the SAME scenes (from essentially the same angle) are a waste of time, tape, money and effort. Not to mention, all of the extra people standing around IN THE WAY!

Too much indecision, too much last minute EVERYTHING, too much drama. Oh, and not for nothin', but when you finally decide to send a note asking for people to print their own copies of the script and bring them to the shoot (which some of us already did - you're welcome), I would think ATTACHING A COPY TO READ AND PRINT would have been a good idea. Oui!?

As John Lennon said: I just have to ----- let it go.

Lots to report, but nothing earth-shattering

In my head I hear the little martian from the Bugs Bunny cartoons asking "Where's the earth-shattering kaboom?"

Sorry, little fella. And sorry to you, dear readers.

While I have been busy, and there is always a carrot of hope/excitement dangling j-u-s-t out of reach, there is nothing concrete and 'wahoo' to report at this time.

For the past month or so, I have been working at the Renaissance Festival business office as an intern in the Marketing Department. No, it's not cool, and NO it's not glamorous....or anything else you may want to think working in a Marketing Department might be. By calling the position an "intern" spot, they are justified in paying $8 freaking dollars an hour. The dangling carrot with this opportunity has been the advent of a movie being filmed on the grounds during the season!

Yes, a movie. Follow the link to "Ye Olde Times" info, listed under Jack Black in the IMDB. Lindsey Lohan had been cast to play opposite JB, but has since been booted and it's our understanding Hillary Duff has now been signed - we shall see.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1034090/

I was able to meet with the pre-production people when they came to the grounds to walk around and speak with the manager about what they were hoping to do, etc., and was told this would be a union movie, with very few non-union jobs. The RenFest folks said I would be the 'liaison' between the production folks and the MRF, but since it doesn't pay anything different (and why would it?), I was still only going to get $8 an hour from the festival side, and not able to work more than 8 hours per day...so you can see the issue becoming sour and uneventful right away, can't you.

I was terribly excited at the whole prospect, but have since been looking at my bottom line (bank account, mortgage payments, additional bills, etc.), and know that while it seemed fortuitous that I was dropped into the path of this gem of an opportunity, the fact that it is to start so far from now has me wondering what am I supposed to do in the meanwhile, waiting for the possibility of getting a maybe payed non-union spot on this project? I still have to make payments and meet obligations from June to August or September. And as much as I would LOVE to work on a major motion picture - this is all of my training and desires for the future - how am I to support my family and cover my bills waiting and waiting and waiting?

I have to keep looking for work elsewhere, but of course, this means taking myself out of contention for working with the film team as I would (hopefully) have a full time job and not be able to get away from it for the time needed to work on the film during the festival. Production companies shoot movies Monday through Friday, just like any other type of job (and on weekends as well). The hours are longer and grueling (not 9 to 5) - and the work I have done on other things has been great fun and great learning experiences...and while you are in the midst of it, you hardly notice the time reeling past.

In SOME instances, that is. When you are getting paid you mind it less than when you are 'volunteering' your time and being taken advantage of. But I digress.

I need the time I would happily put into a production of this nature, and the pay would me enough, but it would only be for a very short time - 2 weeks to 4 weeks, depending on the shoot schedule, pre-prod work and all - and then it would be done. Poof! I would then have to look for work again...still...until I found something. The "internship" with the RenFest is only temporary as well! It ends with the festival schedule in September.

So, if I were in my twenties and had no house or kids to think of, no huge worries or obligations, I would become a production gypsy. As it is, I cannot even contemplate it.

Thoughts, suggestions, comments - anyone?

I thought not. HEllo...communication is a two-way street. I guess I know which of us has found the gas pedal, eh?

Uh oh....

My apologies, Maria, if you took my comment in last blog entry too seriously. :^) Just thought I would try a nudge of a different sort. Once you began to make regular entries, I was enjoying reading them, but then I was sad to find I couldn't get in.

Waaahh.

I am too sensitive for my own good.

And one more thing, while I am at it...

Hey! Montana Mama! Thppbbbbt! You locked me out of your blog?

Harsh!

The fourth of June...ALREADY!?

When the heck did that happen? Seriously.

I haven't posted here in some time (half a month, by the looks of it), and to anyone who visits from time to time...well, I apologize.

The long and the short of it is, I am deeper in the dolldrums and depression than I have been in some time. STILL looking for work, and done with unemployment. ACTUALLY...unemployment is done with me. After a year, you are through whether things have improved for you or not! And believe you me, things are not improved.

I had an interview today for a preschool secretarial position, and it was a sad thing to be sure. Nice people, but as the job and the conditions, etc., were explained to me, I began to lose hope/interest.

At first, I thought this would be the ideal position, as spring and summer would be available for me to take the sporadic PA gig and work on as many production jobs as I could get onto - thus building a work rep and gaining experience. But then, reality began to set in, and I saw the $12 per hour as nothing, really. There would be very few days of work from this point until the new school year, and I at least have 40 hours a week with the Ren job (at $8/hr - OUCH!) until something comes along.

Something with more hours...something with MORE pay...something at least in my new field?

Am I asking too much?

Apparently so.

On the brighter side, there may be an exciting development at the Ren grounds this summer, and it may lead to something production-like for me (in two different ways). I will keep you updated on this as I am allowed to let the cat out of the bag...right now, it just wouldn't be a good thing. However, it is exciting, so please keep your fingers and toes crossed, and good thoughts in your heads for me.

Meanwhile, it is time to get back to other things. But here's a funny or two for your amusement, since you've been very patient whilst I sorted through my snarky cloud.