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1.03.2009

Sometimes, one smile means more than a dozen roses

What!?!?

A friend (THANK YOU, JEAN) brought over a bag of r-e-a-l-l-y dark chocolate Dove mini's, and we had fun (all of us) devouring the darned things. But, have you ever noticed that the foil wrappers have fortune-like sayings inside? Some people never take the time to observe...so I can imagine the candy being liberated from its wrapper, and the foil being discarded without so much as a glance at the saying hidden inside. Poor wrappers.

Sad little wrappers.

Oddly enough, I was reading my wrappers this weekend (because I am diligent and somewhat compulsive regarding such simple things) when I came across the saddest excuse ever for not spending a little scratch ,or taking time to think (and act) before a particularly important ocassion or celebration, and it could only have been written by a man.

I can only imagine that the man who wrote this little ditty was looking for some weak-knee'd, slack-jawed, Hallmark-sort-of-way, to let himself out of a (sorely needed) butt-chewing -- most likely for forgetting an anniversary, birthday or other meaningful event.

Yes...you guessed it, ladies. It was: "Sometimes, one smile means more than a dozen roses."

A smarmy little homily meaning 'I didn't feel like stopping on the way home (from hanging with the guys) to grab a raggedy handful of four-day-old wilted roses from the cooler at the neighborhood Kroger. Heck, why should I, when I know one of my smiles is worth more than a dozen roses.'

Have you fallen on the ground and smacked yourself silly?

Seriously?

If you didn't fall on the ground and smack yourself silly, please...allow me. I am in a smack-someone-silly-just-for-the-pure-pleasure-of-hearing-the-sound kind of mood.

Smackety-smackety-smack-smack-smack! C'mere you coward.

Sometimes, a smack means 'I forgive your cheap *ss'.

1 comment:

Rie said...

LOL, you are so FUNNY!!! You should be somewhere drawing cartoons to to go along with all of these antics....I can see you now!! SMACK! SMACK, SMACK, SMACK!! Poor Fella, doesn't stand a chance!! I guess dead roses are better than no roses! Ha!